I am competetive by nature. I am intense, I over analyze, I strive for perfection. I can be obsessive and compulsive, and hard on myself, but I achieve results. And there are some who think I am too competetive.
How does it look to enjoy something?
I realize now that my competetive nature and my strive for perfection, to some, make it appear that I am never happy, never satisifed with my results. I seem stressed, unhappy, and negative.
I also find it interesting that most of the critique is coming from males. Coincidence? I don’t think so. In the world of work, if you are a assertive, pushy, a perfectionist, and female, you are seen in a very different light than if you are a male. The same is true in sports. When males compete, nobody thinks twice about their competetive nature. Males compete for the fun of it. Males talk about their conquests, brag about their results, and vow to come back even stronger than ever the next time around. The men in my life think I am too competetive. I wonder what they would think if I were a male?
I have been competetive my whole life- at school, at play, at work and at recreational sports. I enjoy competing. Does that mean I expect to win? No, of course not. Do I get frustrated with my effort at times? Of course! But I compete because I enjoy the journey. There is a prize at the end of the journey-even if I do not achieve a low score, a PR, or a win-there is something to work toward. The reward is in the competition.
Does that mean I am not enjoying the journey? Of course not! I understand the journey is not perfect, but it is the vision and the competition at the end that inspires me. If not for the competition, what is the point?
I will always compete. It is in my nature. I want to work toward lowering my handicap, increasing the length of my drive, increasing my speed and endurance, doing more, doing it better, and becoming more efficient. I will push myself to the extreme, I will ignore good advice, but I will learn from it all. I AM enjoying the journey. Just do not expect me to take it easy, that is no fun.